Marriage Success Stories and No Blame, No Shame Imago Therapy Reviews
The following imago therapy reviews and marriage success stories will warm your heart. All of them are authentic and were sent to us, unsolicited, by clients and program participants.
For me the first step was reading your book as I was preparing for our 30th wedding anniversary. The Power of Commitment touched me very deeply and opened my eyes not just to the impact it has on our marriage.
I first realized on a personal level, how I needed to commit to myself, my own well-being, before I could commit to a marriage. Wow, after being with someone for 30 years, raising children together, this was HUGE!
Without that first step to make a commitment to myself, I couldn’t commit to my spouse, even though I really wanted our marriage to work.
Later, I talked my husband into 😉 signing up for Marriage School together.
He reluctantly agreed, and we did the first few Modules together.
At a certain point (asking for an appointment to dialogue) he quit and said it’s not working. I was quite upset at first, but then just continued on alone. I could apply the principles of Communication even without him formally agreeing to participate. Not in a manipulative way. Just naturally, asking for feedback (mirroring), asking if I / it made sense etc.
A few months into this “invisible” (on his part) Marriage School practice, we are so close and so much more gentle with each other.
I love sharing appreciations and acknowledgements and have naturally softened myself in the process. I don’t feel threatened anymore even when we disagree. I don’t panic even when he loses his centre and comes from the “Little Boy”..
Talking about self empowerment!
You are right, I’ve been on the spiritual path form my adolescence and Desired Truth and Enlightenment, and nothing compared to the Practice Ground of Marriage to truly feel En-Lightened and Em-Powered.. when we have the right guidance and tools as well as Commitment, Patience and Willingness!
Deep Gratitude for your work, may it resonate with many!
We’d be separated right now if not for Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin. Ten years of marriage, 3 kids under 6, and ongoing arguments about the same issues brought us to a fork in the road. We had a breaking point that started the divorce process. After a week of separation, we agreed to seek counseling. We found a praised relationship counselor, but our meetings with him led to increased resentment, new ways to hate each other, arguing, and the worst feeling either of us have ever had. Counseling failed miserably. I was seeing an independent therapist, who happened to be an Imago certified counselor, and he gave me the book “getting the love you want,” and the text resonated with both of us. After searching for retreats, we found Rabbi Slatkin. My wife was raised Catholic and I was raised without religion. Finding a new point of view was important to both of us. We wanted to truly listen to and seek guidance from a new influence. We live in Michigan and drove to Baltimore for the session. My wife and I found what we were looking for! We found each other in the deepest way possible. No arguments. No resentment. We felt like we started a second marriage or graduated from “marriage college”. We are eager to recommend the Imago process, and Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin, to any couple. Especially those seeking restoration of their marriage, a deeper connection, or couples who need to “find each other” again.
Tracy & Fred, Michigan
* At the brink of a break-up, after 21 years of marriage, we took one last step to try and save our union. We investigated numerous couple therapists, and researched in detail how they conduct their versions of marriage intensives. After multiple rounds of interviews, we began to feel that Shlomo Slatkin, while being as competent as anyone else, also radiated this special, warm confidence – as if he was doing his life’s purpose and we were THE couple he was going to help. With a balanced mix of structure and sensitivity to our needs, Rabbi Slatkin confidently guided us through two days of self-reflection, discovery, and transformation. Combined with the “Getting the Love You Want” book, authored by Imago’s founders, Shlomo Slatkin’s intensive allowed us to undergo two individual transformations, and a third one – the transformation of our marriage. After the intensive, we embarked firmly on building a new type of union – the conscious marriage – that we realized we never really had (and that everyone deserves and is able to build). And after the retreat, Shlomo Slatkin did not leave us with unfinished business, but instead guided us through numerous & productive, 1.5-hour Skype sessions to build better communication and marriage building skills. Today, we enjoy deep, newly-found intimacy at all levels in our relationship. We are forever grateful to Rabbi Slatkin for saving our marriage, saving our love! And we recommend Rabbi Slatkin with no hesitation to couples in search of marital help & advice!!!
Ian & Vanessa
* Thank you so much for your book!!! It is the best book that I have ever read about marriage counseling. I finished reading the whole book within 2.5 hours I was not able to put it down. Every single page described me and my marriage and I can not thank you enough for putting it down so black and white! I have been married for 7 years and most of the time I disrespected my husband, blamed him mostly for everything, and saw myself superior to him. Yesterday, the camels back broke and I found myself hitting rock bottom. Yesterday night I think I had the first true conversation with my husband since before our marriage! Thank you again!
* Your book was very helpful to me. Last year it was (more specifically the Chapter on Commitment) part of a very powerful process leading up to our 30th wedding anniversary, resulting in an opening to myself on a very deep level I never knew was possible before. This opening consequently became a catalyst for a very healing journey for our marriage… still unfolding…I love the feeling I get when you send emails. Just seeing your names reminds me of the great shift in my experience, the Divine Gift you gave and I was able to receive. Thank you! With Respect and Appreciation.
* After going through your program, I feel like a completely different person. Although we have spent years in therapy, we were still on the verge of divorce. The skills we have learned with your imago therapy have helped us break the vicious cycle of conflict and we are actually able to enjoy each other’s company again.
* I pulled your program down from the shelf on the very day I got an e-mail from you. I put it up there many months before, thinking everything was, shall we say, hunky-dory. It was not. After much insistence and cajoling, my wife started to read the book. I have already finished reading it. Things have started to improve. Just the process of acknowledging and trying to improve our relationship is powerful stuff!
* “We are forever grateful to you! The suggestions in your marriage program are working so well, even with our infidelity situation. Outbursts due to the rupture from affair are becoming less frequent!”
* The 2 day private marriage retreat with Rabbi Slatkin helped my husband and I gain real tools on how to communicate and truly hear one another. He had a wonderful way of calming us and making us feel heard and safe in order to get to a place where we can break old habits and attain new and healthy ones.
* If you’ve had it ‘up to here’ in your marriage, and feel like it’s a losing cause, we suggest you invest in Marriage Mastery. Through a series of thought-provoking questions, engaging audio, and over one hundred pages of text, you’re guided through five meaningful steps that help you re-evaluate the reason you married in the first place, and how to recommit your heart to your mate and marriage. Give this information your attention & effort, and you will be on the path to marriage restoration!
Kevin & Cetelia Bullard
* Dear Rabbi Slatkin,
My husband and I just got back from our 2 day Intensive couples counseling sessions with you. I’m not even sure where to begin! We are blown away! We are married for close to two years and in recent months our relationship kept spiraling downward as we increasingly became upset with each other due to expectations we deemed unmet as well as constant misunderstandings! We’ve been seeing another therapist who was trained in EFT for about 10 weeks but we were becoming more frustrated, despondent, and hopeless as things seemed to be getting worse versus better!!! As our last session by our previous therapist resulted in my husband angrily and frustratingly stating “I’m out of this marriage”, I realized WE MUST FIND HELP ELSEWHERE ASAP!!
Luckily, after extensive research I chanced upon your site. Somehow, the messages conveyed as you readily share your own experience with Imago therapy in your marriage and your belief in the foundation of marriage that if there are true intentions all marriages can be helped, resonated in me as true and meaningful! I am so glad I reached out! I must say my husband was very skeptical that indeed this type of therapy will be helpful and an answer to all our problems. He was especially concerned since I had SO MANY issues with him that he couldn’t fathom we’d even get trough half in 2 days. Luckily, my husband is indeed a caring, loving, and smart man and having seen my strong feelings toward this very likely helping us he surprised me by booking our 2 day intensive appointment! This has been the best gift ever!
We both feel that working with you has helped us beyond our wildest dreams. We feel that the imago process and your facilitating our dialogues was conducted with amazing dignity and expertise from your end. The sessions throughout was within a calm and respectful atmosphere which enabled us to feel safe, and vulnerable and thus allowing for healing and understanding to come about naturally and constructively!
Kudos to you for such amazing great work! Your empathy, caring, and passion for what you do along with your knowledge and expertise shown through!
May you continue helping many others who can so benefit from your work, just as we did!
David and Esther
Boro Park, Brooklyn, New York
* I had little hope for our marriage surviving and wondered how we could possibly deal with two decades of hurt and dysfunction in a relatively short time. In fact, just like the books say, having the experience of “being heard for the first time” was profoundly and instantly transformative. I can hardly think of a marriage that wouldn’t benefit from work with him. And thinking of all of the people I know who have been divorced, I think that at least half of the marriages could have been saved by two days with Rabbi Slatkin.
Ruth, Cleveland, Ohio
* “Thank you for working with us in such a kind, compassionate, competent manner and helping to give us hope – hope that not only can our marriage survive, but actually thrive, flourish and become healing rather than destructive.”
Barb S. New York, NY
* “After going through your program, I feel like a completely different person. Although we have spent years in therapy, we were still on the verge of divorce. The skills we have learned have helped us break the vicious cycle of conflict and we are actually able to enjoy each other’s company again.”
Harold, Brooklyn, New York
* “Rabbi Slatkin, you have given us such a gift by working with us. After being ready to give up, I have new hope for our relationship. I really feel like I have a willing partner and that our marriage is worth fighting for.”
Maria, Latin America
* “My husband and I were on the verge of separating and probably divorcing. Just prior to my taking the necessary steps to make that happen, my husband asked me if I would be willing to consult with Rabbi Slatkin first. We had previously considered asking Rabbi Slatkin for help, but did not follow through, and, instead sought help elsewhere. Although, the other help we sought was useful, we found that we were at an impasse and could make no further progress.
I agreed and asked Rabbi Slatkin to schedule us for his intensive program as I thought nothing less than something INTENSIVE could possibly help us at that point. Rabbi Slatkin recognized my urgency and was very responsive, scheduling us within a few days.
I must admit that although I was willing, I was definitely not optimistic, nor was I entirely open to us working things out with each other. I was only open to the slight possibility that our marriage could continue.
However, I was convinced that Rabbi Slatkin would be providing me a safe place where I could at the very least, say what I wanted to say without fear of my husband’s reaction. I no longer felt I had anything to lose. Knowing a very little bit about Imago therapy, I thought I might also find out some valuable things about myself whether or not my husband and I were able to work things out.
To my surprise, all three happened. I said what I wanted to say, I found out some extremely important things about myself, AND my husband and I both feel we have a good chance at marital success now that we know more information about each other and have tools to utilize to assist us in maintaining the open lines of communication in our marriage.
This was an extremely expensive solution that we could not afford to NOT do. We are both extremely grateful to have been able to take Rabbi Slatkin’s intensive program.”
Diane, Baltimore, MD
* I am feeling very hurt from painful history in our 9 years of marriage. my husbands anger and quick temper made me very doubtful that he’d be able to handle the mirroring process. but it really worked to keep him from lashing back when I shared my hurt. I was for the 1st time able to feel like he was starting to hear me.
* “We have tried many things for many years and I literally had to drag my wife along. After the 1st day of the intensive, she looked forward to waking up in the morning again for the first time in a long time.”
Josh, Baltimore, Maryland
*“I would like to say how much I appreciate participating in 2 days intense session with Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin. It helped me a lot to understand what issue I have what was missing in our relationship what I’ve done wrong and what I need to do. Book materials, techniques, exercises and examples were so helpful. Positive atmosphere during sessions, guidance and help from rabbi, dialogues and open minded conversations brought a lot of positives and hopes. . I believe we found right way to go in our marriage and relationship. Thank you so much “
Victor, Annapolis, Maryland
Sara, Rockville, Maryland
* When we participated in your Two Day Marriage Intensive about six weeks ago, we were at a crossroads in our relationship. We were recovering from infidelity, separated, and hoping to get some clarity as to whether there was a future for us and our young family. We walked away with hope that our communication could be different and that we could be more transparent with each other.We knew it would take time to decide our future but we were definitely open to the possibility that the relationship could last.Six weeks later, we are still experiencing positive results.We are spending more time with each other, having fun again, and our able to communicate with out the constant reactivity and defensiveness that was plaguing our relationship. While it will take time to rebuild the trust that was broken, we are hopeful that as we continue to implement and integrate the work we did with you that we will build a more solid future for our family. We can’t thank you enough for your help.C and K, Baltimore, MD
I receive your weekly blogposts and read your recent post entitled “ How do you know when your marriage is over?”. You debunked common reasons that couples see as warranting divorce and boldly claim that even the worst marriage can be saved. I wanted to write you so that you can share with your readers our story because if any marriage was doomed to fail, it was surely ours.
We came to see you almost a year ago for therapy. As you may remember we only came for one session and we were in bad shape. My husband did not want to continue and being that we he was unemployed and I was making a meager salary, we couldn’t afford weekly sessions. We did get your digital program though we didn’t touch it for months. The marriage got worse to the point where he through burning grease at my face. I thought it was over. Things only got worse from there. My husband was put in jail on false charges, I lost my job, and then I found myself sick for months. I discovered there was a sewage leak in my bedroom that was contributing to my condition. This was the turning point. When we first received the digital download, I downloaded your audio mp3s to my husband’s phone, hoping he would listen to them.
I started to notice that our communication had changed. He had implemented some of the strategies you suggest on his own. We began connecting again. We stopped the constant bickering. For the first time in a long time, I had hope that our marriage could succeed.
We are now expecting our first child any day now and couldn’t be happier. Thank you so much. Your program saved our marriage and we are eternally grateful. Please continue to let other couples know that if your program could help us, it could help anyone, as you would be hard pressed to find a marriage as bad as ours was.
Z, Baltimore, MD
* “Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin has done truly outstanding work in helping couples strengthen their marriages and grow together as human beings and Jews. His emphasis on honest open communication,on self-understanding ,and on using the challenges of life as a springboard for personal transformation has changed many lives for the better.I enthusiastically endorse both him and his techniques.”
Rabbi Yitzchak A. Breitowitz, Woodside Synagogue, Silver Spring, Maryland.
* “Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin’s approach to relationship therapy is truly revolutionary. His efforts to mend damaged relationships are widely recognised and are to be commended. The members of the Rabbinical Council of Victoria benefited greatly from their recent meeting with Rabbi Slatkin, who provided valuable tips on matters such as conflict resolution and relationship counselling. His groundbreaking approach to shalom bayis is helping couples the world over and I wish him ongoing success.
Rabbi Yaakov Glasman, President, Rabbinical Council of Victoria
I am writing to thank you for your very interesting presentations that I attended in Melbourne in Elul 5770. I heard you speak three times, and I found the Imago Relationship Therapy to be both consistant with Torah Hashkafa and extremely effective in helping couples work towards Shalom Bayis. The emphasis on Shmias B’Ozen: to hear what the other person is saying, to feel what they are feeling, and to understand what they are thinking invariably leads to changing ones actions. When I have spoken about Imago, people have been very impressed. I gave several very successful shiurim on Teshuvah using the Imago concept of trying to understand how the Borei Ha-Olam must “feel” (keva’yachol) when we don’t appreciate all that He does for us. The concept of subconsciously marrying a person who is a combination of your parents’ middos in order to facilitate a tikun on your own middos and self-esteem developed during your formative years to be fascinating and emesdik!
Hashem yisbarach should�bensch you with further success in your important work, and I hope that many pulpit rabbis invite you to speak to their kehillahs so that they and their mispallelim will be inspired and will benefit from the Imago Relationships Therapy.
Rabbi Yirmi Garfunkel
– Ephraim and Rochel. Melbourne, Australia
* “Rabbi Slatkin’s knowledge of Torah coupled with the Imago therapy dialogue method have made his presentation very palatable to Jewish audiences around the world as he shows how the dialogue process fits completely into Jewish Ideology.
He has now given me the tools to learn how to listen and reflect back in a way that makes the other person feel heard and respected without any judgments. This automatically lifts your relationship and feeling of connectedness to a much higher level.
Full kudos is due to Rabbi Slatkin for this life saving work in people’s relationships and marriages. The Imago therapy dialogue is must learn skill for anyone that wants to have harmonious relationships of any kind.”
– Aron, Melbourne, Australia
* Rabbi Slatkin introduced us to an innovative method for effective communication. The real life scenarios that he role-played had us laughing out loud! His presentation was interactive, practical, and laced with good humor. Highly recommended!
We asked Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin to come out to Charlotte, NC and do a couples Imago therapy workshop for our community. We had ten couples attend this workshop and it was a great success. We all knew each other, which was very nice because we were all able to enjoy each other and connect on a deeper level. Rabbi Slatkin’s presentation on Imago therapy was very informative and inspiring. Each couple was able to practice several different techniques that the Rabbi introduced. I particularly enjoyed the part when one couple was asked to volunteer to do a sample therapy session. It was so intriguing! My husband and I learned a lot about Imago and communication in general. We continued to use the Imago techniques after the workshop. G-d willing, we will bring Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin back to Charlotte for round 2!
* “What I liked best about this presentation was that there were demonstration, explanations, and opportunities to practice. Without the practice the presented information may have just remained theoretical and many couples may not even try to do it on their own when they leave and would never see the benefit of it.”
* “The demos which you and Rivka did – they made it easier for us to do since it was practical and we were “copying.” It was better than just hearing the methods explained and then we have to try to copy them. It was also great that you threw in personal experiences. It makes us feel that everyone needs to work on a marriage – even a marriage counselor. And it’s nice to see that it is not just in theory, but real issues which you have worked out.”
*”This is a very practical workshop/method which teaches both members of a couple how to listen and communicate and show love, care, and appreciation. I would recommend it to all couples. It is like preventative medicine for a marriage because it gave us a way to talk without reacting and speak about each other’s good points.”
- 32 years in it’s like our honeymoon again!The Marriage Restoration Project has helped me to renew and restore and revive our marriage. After 32 years, and 5 kids, we were not used to being alone. The easy 5 step program helped us open communication and reconnect with each other. Now we are using the 5 steps to help the next generation heal and help their marriages.
Thank you!Leah goldford
* Thank u! U really nailed it!It’s amazing to c how u summarized it in five steps.Thanks again.H.T
*Turns out major relationship improvement is possible! This user-friendly program shows you how.The videos are professional and inspiring. I was impressed with the way they demonstrated how to turn frustration, blame, and criticism into opportunities for closer connection, better mutual understanding, compassion, and growth as a couple. When I practiced offering appreciation statements, I realized just how valuable and healing this is when done right, and how easy it is to compliment one’s spouse yet miss the mark!S.G.
*Very relevant and practical insights for all couplesThe insights provided are practical, relevant, and useful to anyone in a relationship, and can help strengthen the bond between two partnersZyx
*After 20+ years of marriage more insight on how to make it work betterOver 20 years of marriage where you think that’s just the way the person I married is. The marriage project gave us insight on how to make each one of us a better spouse.Moishe David
*Help is on the way
Encourages introspection and taking personal responsibility while offering hope and practical tools to apply to your own marriage. Insightful and helpful – read it now – there’s nothing to lose and everything to gain.Wendy
*Outstanding and Very Informative!The Marriage Restoration Project is an amazing idea and is brought to us by two amazing people. It seems as if Rabbi Slatkin has really nailed the understanding of how a marriage could and should work and how essential it is to work hard in marriage to make it great. The Marriage Restoration Project is thorough, concise, and clear. I would recommend that anyone who is looking to get married should HIGHLY consider Rabbi Slatkin’s course!Yoni D.
*Knowledgeable and Eye-OpeningI enjoyed the information that was presented to me. It was full of a vast amount of knowledge, eye-opening, and simple for anyone to understand. I would recommend this resource to anyone needing assistance in improving, enhancing, or restoring his or her marriage. Thanks.S.S
*Hello, first want to say how happy I am that I found your site, system and book. I purchased a digital copy of The Marriage Restoration Project on amazon the moment I finished reading the first two chapters. I stayed up all night that first night reading from it, I reread the first two chapters. The reason I stayed up that while night wasn’t just because of the book, I got the book for the same reason I was up that night. I’d been unable to sleep for almost two months until I would pass out after a few nights, only getting 4 hours every other night.
That reason was me, well mostly me, and my difficulty understanding my feelings and expressing them openly in spoken words, it had become a crippling fear of mine in regards to my wife. My wife is the greatest wife I could have hoped for, sent from God to save me, and when we got together 12 years ago almost to the day. She is going for her bachelor’s then doctorate right now, and as you can guess, that takes so much time, almost all of her time. We have a 3 and 7 year old boys. Our schedules are opposite for the kids sake and two wonderful grandmothers who help when we have over laps, my wife really only gets two days with the kids and up to 8 or 10 hours a week with me.
The time we get is only intimate in any way maybe two hours, broken up, and physical intimacy has become a scheduled once a week, lasting an hour. My pain comes from a lack of time, affection and intimacy. I know and trust completely that she isn’t cheating, but the mind can be terrible when you have so many scars from before her. The truly wonderful thing, because of your book, I had hit bottom and the end of my rope, luckily I was at the bottom so I didn’t have far to fall. I couldn’t keep going through this, especially silent. So I spent the last few days reading and thinking and focusing. Then today the timing was perfect and so were my thoughts. She has known mostly about how I felt from seeing me weeping but not the why, just the hurting. I can’t cause her or the kids or myself any more pain.
This morning after breakfast before she left, I told her in the clearest, calmest way ever about my feelings and what I needed to do and what she could do to help, this is still my problem with me only I can fix. The relief I felt from telling her why I had such pain was so wonderful I want to cry about my joy and excitement for our future, rather than just pleading prayers to God, which kept me here in every way of course.
But G-d led me to you, when I truly needed it more than I ever imagined I would. I apologize if I’ve rambled, repeated, or jumped the ideas around. I’m certain you understand what such excitement and relief can do. I told her about your program, and even without her if it is, I would like to start it. Thank you Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin, I have purchased and read over and over other books for years trying to fix me, but nothing work more than thoughts to think. Just two chapters was enough to give me the courage to face my greatest fear like a true warrior of God, which was how my grandmother always taught me. With greatest thanks and wishes and joyful hopes to hear from you again.
*This program is such an amazing resource and I am honored to support your work. Thank you for all you are doing to make a difference!
Kirk Martin, CelebrateCalm.com
*Thank you very much Rabbi!
I started to read your amazing book yesterday night, first the complete book, and then I’m planning a second reading together with my beloved husband…to put in practice each and every one of your advice and exercises. Thank you very much, it’s totally amazing each and every word…
*We went on our first date night last night and had a wonderful time talking this morning. I look forward to the journey.
*Rabbi Slatkin, I can’t say thank you enough, your marriage work book is changing mine and my husbands lives. I am 60 years old and he is 63. I was so fearful of spending the last years of my life just getting by but with the help of G-d and your book our marriage is taking on a new level. Thank you so much. for your gift. I hope to speak with you soon.
*“Any couple interested in restoring their marriage and sustaining it will be blessed if they follow the logical and clear steps and processes described by Rabbi Slatkin in the Marriage Restoration Project. The concepts are clear, the instructions are logical and the heart of the author are evident on every page.”Harville Hendrix, Ph. D. co-author with Helen LaKelly Hunt of Making Marriage Simple: Ten Truths for Changing the Relationship You Have into the Relationship You Want.
Individual results will vary in all of our programs and services. Our marriage work with you is going to always depend on your level of commitment and the amount of work that you put into following our program. That is why we provide this disclaimer on our website so that you understand that your level of results may differ from one couple to the next!
*Individual Results May Vary