What to do if you are no longer physically attracted to your spouse?
Life happens, kids happen, weight gain happens. And sometimes our partner can look very different than they did when we first met. What can you do if you are no longer physically attracted to your partner? Let’s think back to when you first fell in love and knew you wanted to commit to the one […]
Are there any couples that are beyond help? Is it ever just too late?
Lots of couples talk with us about their situation and then ask if they’re the worst couple we’ve ever seen. The answer is usually no of course 🙂 Underneath their question is a deeper one which is- “Are we beyond hope? Is this just too messy to fix and is it just too late for […]
When You Physically Recoil from Your Spouse Due to Past Sexual Trauma
Any past traumatic experience keeps a person in survival mode- a tensing of the physical body and the mind – as the brain has one job, which is to keep you safe. Anything that reminds you of the past trauma is going to trigger you and make you feel super reactive all the time because […]
When you can’t trust your spouse, how can you participate in couples counseling? And why should you?
If you can’t trust your spouse, you might be asking yourself why you should even spend the time sitting in the room with him/her working on your marriage! After all, they are the one that cheated and/or betrayed your trust, that wasn’t something you chose to do. This question is one that we get asked […]
How is Imago marriage counseling different from other marriage counseling that you’ve tried?
We get asked that question a lot… “how is your marriage counseling program different than any of the other marriage counseling that we’ve already tried?” At our last group setting couples retreat we held here in Baltimore, MD, a couple asked us the very first day of the retreat, “Our previous therapist told us we […]
Keep a Marriage Gratitude Journal to Help You Appreciate Your Relationship
Nobody means to take their spouse for granted but sometimes we unfortunately get busy with life and our day-to-day routines that we start forgetting how much we appreciate one another. One of the secrets (and maybe it’s not-so-secret) to helping your marriage thrive over time is to maintain an ongoing sense of appreciation and […]
How to Discuss Vaccines When You and Your Spouse Disagree
A healthy marriage is a safe haven. It’s a place where partners can discuss important and often difficult topics as they make informed decisions with integrity, honesty, and confidence. But when you and your partner disagree about something—especially something as polarizing as the COVID-19 vaccine—it can feel difficult to discuss it without regressing to unproductive and frustrating interactions that leave you both […]
Is it Okay to See Your Marriage Therapist without Your Spouse?
Most relationship therapists have a policy regarding individual sessions with clients who are attending therapy together. Sometimes counselors allow individual counseling if one party seeks it, while others do not because it can make the other partner feel like their therapist is taking sides. If you have an upcoming session and your partner can’t make […]
On Fighting Fair: How to Disagree with Your Spouse without Fighting
One difference between couples in a healthy versus an unhealthy marriage isn’t whether they argue—it’s how they argue. Think about it; virtually all spouses are going to butt heads from time to time. It’s an inevitable outcome of individual minds creating a life together while still being true to themselves. In fact, a study conducted by John Gottman determined […]
4 Things to Do When Dealing With a Toxic Family Member
It’s normal to have arguments, disagreements, and moments of frustration with our in-laws and close loved ones. If the disconnect becomes harmful and toxic, far beyond the occasional “button pushing” that all family members engage in it’s time to take action. “Family.” The word is dynamic, diverse, and loaded with history—and for all of us, occasional conflict, too. How […]
Crafting the Perfect Apology for Your Spouse: A Checklist
It’s so important to make goals that are attainable and realistic in life and our relationships. Most of us have accidentally or inadvertently said or done things that upset our partners. That’s why knowing how to apologize genuinely and effectively is key to maintaining a healthy relationship. Which of these sound like a more beneficial […]
How Trauma from the Past Affect our Adult Relationships
Sometimes when we try to succeed in life, we are held back by trauma from childhood. Trauma plays a huge role in relationships. Not only does childhood trauma impact your relationship with your parent, it unconsciously influences your partner selection and can impact all of your relationships. We find that people tend to look for […]
When Parents Argue – Do Kids Notice?
Children are receptive to the intricate nuances and body language their parents display in front of them. As much as we would like to believe that our children are spared from the marital discord we experience, John Gottman’s research proves that children experience trauma when their parents argue and fight. “Marital discord can influence children […]
How Silent Treatment & Repressed Animosity Ruins Relationships (And What You Can Do to Stop It)
Whether you’re on the receiving end of it or you are giving it to your partner, the silent treatment can create a toxic relationship environment. Most of us know what it feels like to be so frustrated during an argument with our spouse that we simply want to shut down, surround ourselves with metaphorical walls, […]
[Clinical Textbook for Therapists] Therapy resources to become more effective when working with couples
Dr. Harville Hendrix just completed the first instructional textbook for clinicians on using Imago therapy with couples! This clinical textbook had been over 10 years in the making and is the HOTTEST new resource for you right now in working with couples in your therapy space. We’ve contacted the publisher and have been able to […]
[Coupon Code PLUS Imago Dialogue Video Examples] Watch Harville and Helen’s New Book, ‘Doing Imago Relationship Therapy’ Come to Life!
Order Harville’s book using Coupon Code for 25% off: Norton90 at http://www.wwnorton.com/ Doing Imago Relationship Therapy In the Space-Between is a MUST-HAVE book in your arsenal of tools for maximizing your therapy work. Here’s what other relationship experts are saying about it: “Straight from the creators of the highly influential Imago Relationship Therapy, this book […]
Should you really talk to someone? A couple’s therapist review of ‘Maybe You Should Talk To Someone” by Lori Gottlieb
It’s no wonder Maybe You Should Talk To Someone by Lori Gottlieb is a runaway best-seller. Written by a therapist about her own personal journey into therapy, it is full of intrigue, vulnerability, and gives the reader insight into the many questions we may have about the world of the therapy and those who practice […]
3 Insightful Ways to Bring Up an Issue With Your Spouse
Want to talk to your husband or wife about something important but don’t know how to bring it up without starting a fight or scaring them away? Whether you’re an introvert, an empath, or find it difficult to have a conversation about something important with your partner; the key to a happy marriage is communication. […]
That’s Funny, Honey: Tips for Using Humor During Marital Conflict to Stop Fights in Their Tracks
Want to know why bringing the heat down a notch during a relationship conflict is so important? Close your eyes and picture the last time you and your spouse laughed together. Really put yourself in that memory, conjuring up how it felt. It felt good, right? Want to feel it again? There’s no question that […]
Relationship Repair Attempts: What They Are, Why They Work & 10 Examples for Your Own Marriage
Relationship researcher Dr. John Gottman calls repair attempts the happy and emotionally intelligent couple’s “secret weapon.” Even if you’ve never heard of them before, it’s possible you and your partner already use repair attempts during conflicts. But hopeful partners be warned; using a repair attempt doesn’t necessarily guarantee it will work. Keep reading to learn more […]