How To Use Mindfulness To Resolve Unhealthy Marriage Conflicts
Productive marital conflict can help you work through complex challenges and compromise on important issues. But it’s easy to get reactive during conflicts and feel the survival urge to fight, flee or freeze. If reactivity becomes the norm, you could also become unhappy and frustrated in your marriage. Try using mindfulness to become more aware, […]
The Importance of Intentional Validation & Empathy in Your Relationship
Intentional validation in marriage is the act of validating your spouse’s feelings and expressions intentionally to ensure they feel like their feelings are valid. Have you ever felt like your husband or wife wasn’t really “getting” what you were trying to say? Unfortunately, many of us have experienced this feeling. In the rush of day-today […]
Signs Your Husband is Experiencing Long-Term Grief & What You Can Do to Help Him Move Forward
Behavior among grieving men and women typically differs dramatically. Women usually embrace the gut-wrenching feeling of bereavement, allowing themselves to cry and show vulnerability. It’s more common for men to become detached and/or shut down emotionally and physically while grieving. This is because most men deeply value their role as caregivers and providers, so they […]
Prioritizing Your Spouse Even When You’re Busy with Work & Kids
Sometimes there just isn’t enough time in the day to all the things you planned on, but you always have time to spend 5 minutes of quality time with your spouse to reconnect. After getting the kids ready and off to school in the morning, the mad dash to get yourself ready for work and […]
5 Ways You Might be Undermining Your Marriage Without Even Realizing It
As spouses, we sometimes do seemingly innocuous things that end up being much more harmful to our marriage than we realize, especially if we do them repeatedly over time. In other instances, what might look like “normal” behaviors can actually be a warning sign of underlying distress within the relationship. To keep the allegorical “slowly boiling frog” out of […]
How the Big 5 Personality Traits Affect Your Relationships & Marriage Satisfaction
Each of our personalities are as unique as fingerprints but each person’s distinct behavior and feelings when faced with similar situations is deeply affected by our underlying personality traits. Psychologists and sociologists have conducted dozens of studies since the 1980’s to define these traits and identify how each one affects our academic ability and personality. […]
Do Marriage Retreats Really Work? Especially Marriage Intensives & Weekend Couples Therapy Retreats?
Many couples wonder: “Do marriage retreats really work — or is it just another quick fix?” Here’s why we think Intensive Weekend Marriage Retreats Beat Weekly Counseling Every Time. The truth is, retreats aren’t magic. But for many couples, they provide something weekly counseling can’t: an immersive reset, uninterrupted time to reconnect, and a framework […]
How Emotional Neglect Experienced in Childhood Affects Our Relationships as Adults
Did you or your spouse face emotional neglect as a child? Are you concerned that emotional trauma from your past could be contributing to the conflict you’re experiencing in your marriage today? The parallels between the things you experienced in your childhood and how you behave in your your adult life are unmistakable. People who experience emotional […]
Overcoming Intimacy Issues Caused by Childhood Trauma
According to the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration1 (SAMHSA) more than 2 in 3 children experience at least one traumatic event by the time they turn 16. SAMSHA’s examples of potentially traumatizing experiences range from psychological, physical, and sexual abuse to national disasters, neglect, and serious accidents or life-threatening illnesses. These examples are […]
Define Infidelity-Types of Cheating & How they can Affect Relationships
Infidelity occurs when someone has an emotional, financial, romantic, or sexual relationship with someone other than one’s husband, wife, or partner in a monogamous relationship. Experiencing infidelity can be incredibly nuanced, painful, and frightening for any couple going through it. Couples often disagree about what constitutes cheating, which is why we encourage couples to discuss this […]
Do You Have to Beg your Spouse for Attention? Learn Tips for a Closer Connection Without Seeming Needy
Do you ever feel invisible in your own marriage—like you have to beg your husband or wife just to notice you? Maybe you’ve caught yourself dropping hints, getting frustrated, or even pulling away because you’re tired of asking for affection and not receiving it. You’re not alone. Feeling neglected by your spouse is one of […]
Guide to Reconnecting with Your Husband or Wife After A Fight
You’ve had the big argument. The big disagreement. The difficult discussion about that thing you just can’t seem to agree on. A fight, a row, a confrontation. It happens to every couple. Eventually you get into an argument and regret losing your temper or saying something you didn’t mean in the heat of the moment. […]
Sending, Receiving, and Growing: Getting the Most Out of Imago Therapy
Our team of marriage counselors help couples from all walks of life rediscover relationship growth, joy, and a deeper connection. We do this using Imago couples therapy, a comprehensive and thoughtfully structured approach to counseling that truly helps people feel seen, heard, validated, and loved by their partners. If you and your spouse have been thinking […]
What If My Spouse Won’t Come to Counseling? 4 Practical Steps to Try
One of the most common questions we hear is: “What do I do if my spouse refuses marriage counseling?” It can feel discouraging when one partner is open to seeking help while the other is resistant. Maybe your spouse had a bad experience in the past. Maybe they don’t believe therapy works. Or maybe they […]
Can a Joint Bank Account Make Your Marriage Better & Last Longer?
The decision of whether to have joint or separate bank accounts should always be a mutual one. However, it can be a point of contention for couples who don’t agree, couples with vastly different income levels, and one income families with a stay-at-home parent. You’ll have no problem finding supporters and detractors for either approach. […]
4 Ways to Enjoy Better Communication in Marriage for Better Connection: Are You Making These Communication Mistakes?
Are you and your spouse struggling to communicate without fighting, shutting down, or feeling misunderstood? You’re not alone. Communication challenges are one of the biggest reasons couples feel disconnected in their marriage. The good news: communication is a skill you can learn — and when you do, the connection, intimacy, and teamwork return. In this […]
Why Curiosity Matters in a Marriage
Most of us are aware that the honeymoon phase in relationships doesn’t last forever. The good news? It doesn’t have to! You and your spouse can enjoy life together in a loving relationship without experiencing the blinding enamor felt in the honeymoon phase. The goal of this article is to explain why keeping a sense of curiosity […]
Fantasizing About Not Being Married? 3 Signs It’s Time for Marriage Counseling
Don’t wait to get help with your marriage, especially if your relationship has become so unhappy that you’re thinking about what it would be like if you were not married to your spouse. Our colleague, psychologist and relationship researcher Dr. John Gottman, once observed that it takes couples an average of six years1 of unhappiness before […]
My Husband Treats Me Like I Don’t Matter: How Can I Earn His Love & Respect?
When our spouse doesn’t value our input or opinions it can feel like you’re all alone in the world. If your husband isn’t expressing the love and respect that you expect it’s time to think about how this could affect your long-term well-being. Once you’ve come to terms with the ill effects this could have […]
A Financial Inventory for Spouses: Money Questions for Couples (Without the Pressure)
As a licensed couples therapist (Imago-informed, no-blame/no-shame), I see it every week: money isn’t just math—it’s meaning (safety, fairness, freedom, identity). That’s why money talks can feel so charged. The goal here is not to give you a rigid plan; it’s to open a safer, deeper conversation, and—when trust has been nicked by financial infidelity—to […]