Marriage Counseling | Imago Couples Therapy | Marriage Restoration

My Marriage is in Crisis: How Can I Get my Wife to Love Me Again?

“How can I get my wife to love me again?” is a question that many husbands ask themselves, especially when their wives are giving them the cold shoulder or the silent treatment. This marriage crisis may feel impossible to overcome and is definitely the “elephant in the room” if you’re walking around wondering how to get her to love you all the time.

Marriage Crisis Averted with A Simple yet Powerful Technique

A few days ago I chanced upon a school picture of my son when he was five years old. Although he is only nine, he seems like a big boy and it is easy to get caught up in my frustrations with him that I forgot how he was just a baby not too long ago. When I saw that picture, I was aroused with compassion for that cute little guy and I was able to view my current relationship with him from a different perspective.

Apply my personal “walk down memory lane” exercise to your own marriage crisis.

Childhood Experiences Affect Your Spouse’s Behavior & Actions

Time to get nostalgic. If you are in a bad space with your spouse, pull out your wedding album and remember the one you fell in love with.

Another idea is to look at your spouse’s baby pictures and realize that your spouse was once a vulnerable little child. In fact, beneath that exterior which you may feel has caused you so much pain, hides that little child. Have compassion for his/her story and what it may have been like growing up. Begin to see your spouse and his/her behavior in a new light.

One of the powerful tools we teach couples in Step 4 (Acknowledge the Other) of our 5 step online marriage school, is to picture their spouse as a child. It helps us shift the marriage tension by gifting you with new-found compassion and empathy for your spouse. The new compassion and empathy that you now feel will help to enhance the connection that exists between the two of you-rekindling the flame, and helping you to answer your question of “how do I get my wife to love me again”.


More inspiration for Restoring and Reawakening love in your partner:


Next time you are upset with your spouse, hold that picture in your mind’s eye of an innocent little one, open your heart and witness the shift you experience.

If you need to get through this marriage crisis and want to learn how to get your wife to love you again, know that it may be too hard to do this on your own and that it would benefit you greatly to work with a professional. One of the things that we do in our 2 Day Marriage Restoration Retreat is look at why these feelings are coming up and what led to them, so that ultimately they can be healed and you both move forward together as a connected and thriving couple. Talk with us today about our 2 Day Marriage Restoration Retreat. It’s the most important thing you can do for yourself and your family.

There’s nothing quite like the power of gaining clarity on a confusing situation. Complete the form below to talk with Rabbi Slatkin to see what he thinks would be best for you and your unique situation.

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Picture of Shlomo & Rivka Slatkin

Shlomo & Rivka Slatkin

Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin is an Imago relationship therapist and certified (master level) Imago workshop presenter with over 20 years of experience hosting couples therapy retreats in-person and online.

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