One of our readers recently sent me this quote: “I’m glad that what’s going on in my head isn’t happening in my life.” This made me think about the stories we often make up in our head. Consider what would happen if you change your thoughts about your marriage especially if your worried about marriage and all of the potential bad things that your spouse may be doing.

More inspiration about how to change your thoughts about your marriage:

You know, when you think someone is ignoring you or is looking at you funny. You may automatically tell yourself that they are judging you and then you proceed to tell yourself an elaborate story about what the other person is thinking and what you will tell them during your next encounter.

Next time you start making up stories, allow yourself to pause and notice what you are doing.

What triggered you to think these thoughts?

Are these thoughts grounded in reality or are they part of a greater story?

Don’t judge it but notice how the negativity and catastrophic fears and anxiety that you are experiencing in your mind are not necessarily what is happening in your life.

The more you are aware of the incongruity present, the more you will free yourself to explore the source of these thoughts.

As we get conscious about our thoughts and what is truly influencing these distortions, we can be able to better choose if we want to follow that old story line or if we want to pursue a story that is more in line with what is really going on.

The best way to change your thoughts is to see what’s going on underneath the surface. You came to this marriage with your own relationship baggage and so did your spouse. Clean up that baggage in our 2 Day Marriage Restoration Retreat so that you can finally be in a partnership with your spouse not all those people that get in the way from the past! Talk with us about our 2 Day Marriage Restoration Retreat and see that your spouse can actually be the love of your dreams!


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Shlomo & Rivka Slatkin

Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin is an Imago relationship therapist and certified (master level) Imago workshop presenter with over 20 years of experience hosting couples therapy retreats in-person and online. Contact or